I don’t have too many fears or worries concerning my kids, I know they’ll probably have a few times in life when they fall down and get hurt physically. I know there will be times when they will struggle in school or with tackling assignments. I’m sure that they will get discouraged if they don’t make the team or don’t win at something, or they might like someone that doesn’t like them back. All of these things I believe I’ll be able to accept happening to my kids except...bullying.

I can’t stand the thought of having my kids or anyone’s kids bullied. It is one of the things I stress the most in teaching my kids...is to love everyone, be nice to EVERYONE. I had a few friends in elementary that were bullied like nothing else. Their life was HELL. I watched it first hand and it is something I don’t understand and I don’t think I ever will. I consider it a form of terrorism.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about little pushes or slight yelling, evil looks, and I’m not talking about boys will be boys rough housing. I’m talking about real bullying.

It’s something I didn’t think I would even have to deal with until my kids were in school...ya know, teaching them not to bully and not to allow themselves to be bullied. I don’t believe in it. I don’t believe (like some do) that it is good for a child in ANY way, EVER. I don’t think it “builds character” at all. I don’t think it’s good to toughened up that way either.

I took Alex to a park near Abby’s dance class yesterday. Alex went over to play on the playground which he had all to himself.

Soon after, 3 boys arrived. 2 a little older and one that looked just older than Alex’s age. I watched a fair distance away proudly as Alex introduced himself and asked them for their names which the boys told Alex were amy, mary, and the third boy didn’t seem to want to play the game. I just laughed it off and hoped Alex would just play by himself.

Alex then asked them if they wanted to be friends with him and they didn’t say anything and just ran away.

Alex went about his business and climbed up the playground when I saw the boy just older follow him up and grab Alex’s arm and then I heard Alex scream, “I want my mommy” and he came over to me crying. I saw a big welt on Alex’s arm and he told me he had been pinched by the boy. I hugged him and said very loudly so the boys would hear, “go back and play Alex, if that boy touches you again, I will find his mommy and tell her what he did, nobody has any right to touch you and you have just as much right to play on that playground as they do” Yup, that’s what I said REALLY loud.

So, thinking that was enough, but questioning myself. (I’ve never had to deal with this before) I went on reading my book, only to look up just in time to see these boys in a huddle planning something. I didn’t think too much of it. The two older boys took off on their bikes and left the younger one there. I kept reading.

I then heard Alex moan and I looked up to see this boy take off on his bike in a big hurry. I went up to Alex who was crying and walking funny. I looked at his bum and there was white stuff all over him with the playground bark stuck to it. Alex then told me the older boys had put glue on the slide and left and then the other boy shoved him down when he wasn’t looking. He tumbled down the slide and had glue all over his bum and side of his leg and arms.

I don’t know. What would you have done? It was so sad to see him heartbroken and not understanding why they were so mean to him. I didn’t know what to tell him. I just said, “It’s not your fault. Those boys were not nice and I hope you know that I love you and I hope you never make anyone else feel the way those boys made you feel today”.

I then loaded everyone in the car and took off to try and find this boy and his mother. I finally located his bike and found out where he lived. I had to pick up Abby from dance so I took note and came back to the house after where his mom was just getting in to her car.

To be honest, I didn’t want to say anything, but I thought that if that were my son...I would want to know if he was a bully. She looked a little scary, but I still approached her and just told her what happened and that her son really could’ve hurt Alex since he pushed him so hard when he wasn’t looking and so high up on the platform. She seemed to understand, but wasn’t overly friendly, I get that.

Anyway, I just hate the thought of my kids self worth and self esteem being damaged because some other kid wants to tear them down and make them feel worthless. I get a TINY glimpse of how Heavenly Father must feel when he sees his children picking on each other and bullying one another.

I guess the lesson I learned by this experience is that I can’t keep my kids from being exposed to that and I can’t control everything that goes on in their lives. I learned how important it is for me to love my children and build them up in every possible way to help build strong characters that will enable them to withstand anything like that that might go on in their lives. I hope they stand up for themselves and others. I hope they respect and love others.

I hope I can control myself next time and not go and spank the kids butt. That’s my baby boy and I’m a mother bear! Hear me ROAR!!!

so sorry for those of you who are continually dissapointed that you can't open our real blog. I have heard from a few that if you go up to the browser and actually type in www.ourapplebunch.com then it works. So sorry for all of the confusion.

I still have my other blog going if you want to check it out. I'm still trying to work on making it faster for everyone to load. You could try typing in www.ourapplebunch.com to see if that loads faster. Let me know because I haven't made a final decision about iweb or blogspot.

I made these chore charts on Monday morning and we had a great FHE lesson about what makes a happy, healthy family.  The kids caught on pretty well and are very excited to try the charts again.  We’ve tried a different version of this chart before, but we didn’t really enforce it.  Not this time.

So far, we’ve had 3 days of clean rooms and dishes taken over to the sink, toys picked up, and the whole bedtime routine is pretty much understood.  There is even a spot for a sticker if they stay in their bed the WHOLE night.  They kind of forgot about that one Monday night, but it worked well last night.  The last thing I said to them was, “remember to sleep in your beds the whole night to get your sticker”, they both got excited and I guess they remembered. YEAH!  We took the kids out Sat. evening to the Dollar store to pick out treats and prizes for the basket.  If they get all of their stickers or checks for the week, then they get to pick out a prize or treat from the basket.

Anyway, the other chart is to help us get all of our vitamins and good foods in for the day.  I ask them if they want their greens for lunch or for dinner and their fruit and they choose. They also get drinks.  They really love the juices and smoothies that I make with the Blendtec, they are packed with antioxidants and vitamins, so that is awesome.

The other row is for good behavior.  We have only 3 that we’re working on right now.  The kids talk really loud (yes, I’m sure they get it from me), but I’m trying to get them to use a quiet voice inside the house.  The winnie and friends picture is about being kind and sharing.  And the no whining is self explanatory.   I HATE WHINING!  Yes, I know I am whining about them whining, but it drives me NUTS!  I’ve got to stop it now while they’re young.  Notice, Ry get’s Tuesdays off for some of his because that’s his bishopric mtg. night.  Aren’t I so nice!  LOL!

So, wish us luck!  I know some days might be a little off, but I thinks it’s a great guideline to have.

So, we were really bad about getting pictures. We shot some video, but didn’t take many still shots. We didn’t get any of the Saxey Christmas party or the Christensen party either. Ooops! That’s not like us. Owell, Christmas was pretty low key this year, we really only picked out 3 gifts each for the kids and we were very selective about what they were. We wanted to make sure they appreciate them. This picture was taken on Christmas Eve with their new bathrobes. Instead of getting them pajamas which they all already have some, plus we knew that Nana would be getting them pajamas, we went for the robes. They LOVE them. I’m hoping it will cut back on our usage of towels, therefore cutting back on laundry. Hallelujah!

The kids had such a great time this during the Christmas season playing with several nativity sets, but this was their favorite.  And, actually there are two things not quite like the others.  The white shepherd boy borrowed from their other nativity set and of course Donkey from Shrek.  I love this nativity set from Deseret Book, but the kids are right, there is a donkey missing and a shepherd.  

I will never look at Donkey the same again.  He has filled his role honorably and watched over or maybe I should say towered over the baby Jesus like any true nativity donkey would’ve done.  And look how happy he was to do it.

So, if you click on the link above (the title) and it doesn't take you to my REAL blog than please leave a comment and let me know. If you can get on to my other blog, but cannot leave a comment, please leave a comment here on this post to let me know.....or if you can't even open up my other blog, because it takes forever, crashes your computer, or freezes....please leave a comment to let me know either on this post or on the other blog.

Today was Becky’s funeral. It was a great funeral and I believe it left everyone who attended with a greater determination to be better. I know it inspired me to be more like Becky and to be more Christ-like. Some of the things that I remember most about Becky was her listening ear and her words of wisdom. She never preached, she never judged. She just encouraged and loved. She always had a great smile for me no matter what, and when she could tell that I wasn’t too happy, her look automatically turned to concern and she would give me a big hug and ask me how I was doing. She loved to shop the sales at Dillard’s and other stores as well and taught me to look for sales and great deals. She always looked classy. She always had her family looking nice as well. She was diligent. She made sure we went walking and biking for the time that we were committed. She LOVED her children and her family. She always had them prepared and taught them to be nice and considerate of others. I remember taking a valentine or something to Mike once and sure enough not too much longer, Mike was in the car with Becky bringing a valentine (that no boy could’ve ever done on his own) back to me. She was FUN! She let us (Jo and I) stay at her house until very late sometimes. She let us or at least endured all of our crazy water fights. She listened to us babble on and on about life, boys, school and the neighborhood. She even helped plan a water attack against her own boys once just for us, well and Candyce and Melissa helped as well. LOL! I’ll never forget one particular time that Becky helped me. I was home sick from work and got up to use the restroom and passed out. Next thing I knew I was aware I was on the ground with a big bump on my head. My mom was unavailable (for one of the first times ever) and the first person I called was Becky. She immediately came down and sat with me on my bed and talked with me and held me hand. She called Vic Tyler to come and help carry me to the car to take me to the hospital. I later found out I had a cyst on my ovary. She was just so comforting as she always was. I love that picture of Becky because she was sticking her tongue out at me and I remember this night very well. This was the time period we (Jo, me and Becky) were riding our bikes and walking every morning to the point of the mountain and around the mall. We would always finish our morning routine by getting a hot chocolate or a drink. I loved our talks and how Becky helped Jo and I solve our problems or she would just listen and giggle a bit. I’m sure it was pretty pathetic for her to have to listen to. But those were great days that I will never forget. Some of the most recent memories I have of Becky are when we’re deciding about wether or not to move back into the neighborhood and she happened to come by at a moment of stress for me because that particular day we were ready to give up on the whole thing and I was feeling very frustrated and upset. She just hugged me and let me talk. She said she would pray for me, and that she hoped everything would work out so we could be close again. More recently I remember her planning Ty and Mel’s wedding. We teased her a bit about how perfect everything needed to be and how she would agonize over a decision, but I admired all of the details and the way she pulled that day off. It was gorgeous! Perfect! It was fun to watch her while Ty and Melissa were taking their pictures. She was so happy for her baby girl. I remember one night before the wedding, she came down to my house to look at the wedding video Ry and I were doing for them and she was teary eyed watching Melissa’s growing up pictures and she started to really cry when she was listening to their interview and she just kept saying, “I can’t believe it...I can’t believe she’s getting married, it seems like she was just little”. It made me want to enjoy every little moment with my kids, because they grow up so fast. Anyway, I’ve rambled on enough! I wanted to make sure and write this down so that it’s fresh because I’ve been thinking about it and remembering so much this last little while. I’m not sure it’s even really hit me yet that she even had cancer and more especially that she died. It just seems to me like she should still be here and that I’ll see her around the neighborhood and at church and at family parties. I don’t know. The Lord must have had a pretty good reason for taking her from such a great family who needs her. At her funeral, it was repeated that her testing was done, she fulfilled her purpose on this earth. I think that is really beautiful. She was one of the greatest, most loving, kind people that I know and in the end, I’m extremely happy for her. Mike said in his talk, that he was proud of her. I kept looking over at Dennis at the funeral and toward the end, he had such a look of gratitude and of peace on his face. I knew that he was grateful to Becky and loved her, I knew he felt a great love for his children and was very proud of his wife and the legacy that she left. I will miss Becky very much. Cancer really sucks! My heart aches for my sweet sister-in-law Melissa and all of the Stuarts. I know that Becky will always be there watching over them and just as concerned and interested in their happiness as she has always been. The gospel is true and families can be together forever. I truly believe that.

It’s true. I’m pregnant. AND.....we're having a boy. It was kind of a surprise but a nice one. I’m 16 weeks. The due date is around March 8. Another long winter, but at least I can cozy up to the fire, a good book and some hot chocolate, DECAF that is. LOL! Oh wait......I forgot....I have 3 other kids! AHHHHHHHH! Well, I guess I can forget about the good book part. Owell. So far the second trimester has been great. I had kind of a rough start mainly with nausea and fatigue, but I'm feeling much better now and have a little more energy to keep up with the other kids.

Click on the title to get the Vacation Blog We’re off on our 6 week journey. If you click on the link before tomorrow night, you probably won’t find anything too exciting, so wait and check in on Friday. So here is the link to our vacation blog: http://web.me.com/melmommy/Vacation_2008/Blog/Blog.html

Click on the post title to go to the other blog that I am using most. So hopefully, the link will take you to the other blog. Let me know if you have trouble with it. Suzanne, try it and see if it works better for you.

Anyway, so I think this might be the final blog header that I've been working on for Lora's site. What do you think? I love that picture of the three of them. Now I've just got to get going on Mindy and Mom's. I think that I've finally figured out this blogspot thing. I think I really enjoy designing the layouts and stuff, who knows, maybe I'll get so good at this, that I could actually start a business doing it. I would love that.

So, yeah, the header up above isn't for my family.  I am designing it for my sister-in-law.  Just testing this blogger stuff out.  But don't be confused if it keeps changing.

Well, so I was able to get the other blog working again.  Sorry for the confusion.  This Blogspot is a lot more time consuming than my mac.  My mac does all my thinking for me and I usually just have to drag and drop.  

So, we can't seem to get my other web page to post because I think I need more ram, so I think this will be our temporary site since I think it'll be awhile until we actually go in to get it added.  Hopefully I can figure out all this web mumbo jumbo stuff.  It's pretty tricky.  Who knows, maybe I'll become a pro and not want to switch back.  LOL!

Melinda and I should both be in bed, asleep, but instead we are having fun, working side by side on the sweetest computers ever, the iMac.

Well, I just wanted to see how I like the blogspot world over my mac iweb world.  It seems like you have to do a lot more work on this site then the mac.  Owell, it still has a lot of great features on it.  We'll have to see how Ryan likes it.